Flight Traveler Gifts

"Comfort guaranteed, I'll even throw in a pair of compression socks."

A treasure map shows you all the roads without tolls.

"The GPS works great, we have satellite TV installed, the Sirius stereo sounds fantastic and our every move is tracked by Qualcomm. But could you turn around? I left me iphone at the house. . ."

Airline Debts: Layoffs to help us stay afloat.

"Oh indeed I did: I went feral for a year when I was young. It taught me a lot about the world, but about myself too..."

"Yes, six to seven weeks is my life expectancy! Once I learned that, I thought, the hell with it, I'll stop working and start travelling..."

"Tell them we only have romaine!"

"I think our smart home is suffering from separation anxiety. It's following us."

"Legs together, David -- You're hamspreading again."

'You want a quick read? How about this one: 'Memoirs of an Amnesic'?'

Off to see the world

Vaccination Passport

Largest passenger aircraft ever built. "Why does it have to be so big?" "We had to make extra room for all the subsidy money."

"Now boarding group 50 and up."

Lenin, Anticipating His Arrival at Finland Station, Sees His Baggage Taken Off at Beloostrov.

A white collar cow.

'Calm down...it's probably just another mirage.'

"Don't worry. If we're too late, we can always catch the secondary screening."

When travelling with her cat by plane, train, or bus, dawn always ensured no one would bother them.

Rail travel - the environmental alternative (that sometimes doesn't allow bikes)

'It's a great job, but the commuting is murder!'

"You've traveled all this way just to score some pot? Okay—How much do you want?"

'Anything to declare?'

A guy fills up his camel with H2O in the desert.

"Here’s the thermostat. Like all hotel thermostats, it’s just for show."

US Airlines

Miniature Trailer on Desert Island

'And upon landing the pilot will give everyone in first class a hug.'

"Free safety demonstration on board the flight?"

Of course, Hal rented a car with economy gps.

'Termites!'

Notice to travelers: 'Delayed' is the New 'on time'.

"We've been from sea to shining sea! Why don't you admit you're lost!"

'Not only am I a frequent flyer, I'm a frequent waiter.'

Commuter doing some gardening on the train