Flat Earth Theories Gifts

'This must be that planet where they also don't believe they have Global Warming.'

"Do you think the flat earth society has members round the globe?"

"You have reached the edge of town."

You know, if you made it with a sphere, it wouldn't need a railing. Plan.

"I'm going to shoot some hoops with members of the Flat Earth Society."

Two plus two equals five. I don't think so. The earth is flat, or maybe it's shaped like a fish. Huh? Many Republican candidates don't believe in evolution!!! Math, science -- who needs 'em really. That's what I said in high school.

'Let me know when they figure out that it isn't flat.'

'I think that's always how it's been!'

"They seem to be most concerned with what shape it is."

'Just want to give you a heads-up that Danae is outside test marketing her skills in contrarian persuasion.'

Any news on that star that might have a Dyson sphere around it? Nothing new. I mean, they discovered the star's probably been dimming ever since 1890, which could lend credence to the notion an alien race has been building a Dyson sphere. By they discovered that a few months ago. There's been nothing since then, so ... whatever. Must be nothing there. They should do a study to see how long it takes your attention span to dim. What? Why? What're we talking about?

President of Flat Earth departs laterally

"Well, the flat earthers were partially right."

"Sir, there's a crack in our lens!"

'We're not going to Roswell again, it's such a tourist trap.'

A ship sails on water flowing off a flat Earth.

The Fact-Earther's Atlas

'The good news is that it's only flat at the bottom.'

The Globe

'So, what did you decide - Flat earth or 3-D?'

'Please welcome our first speaker who will discuss 'The Challenges of Globalisation'.'

"Don't tell the flat-earthers about this. We'd never hear the end of it."

"Unfortunately, our guest speaker can't make it. He was knocked off the edge by a cat."

Republican Earth Day

The Private Doubts of Christopher Columbus.

I've thought about what you said, about how plate tectonics will kill us all. I think you're being a little alarmist. I've worked out the future configuration of the continental plates. Earth: 250,000,000 A.D. (mathematical equations) I think you forgot to carry the one. The future looks bright.

'I can appreciate your concerns darling, but it is within our price range!'

"If we are going to co-habit, then this is a list of my demands."

Flatlas.

Flatlas

"And now here's the flat earth forecast, it's going to rain everywhere."

Minion, it's come to my attention you've been talking about science to the customers. This will not do. My perusal of our customers' social media posts indicated that a growing number of them believe the earth is flat and science is lame. I don't want you saying anything that might insult the beliefs of this growing minority group. "Dumb" is not a minority. "Dumb" is a slur now, Rudy. The P.C. term is "Dingbat-American."

Flat Earth Society. We have members all over the world. We've gone global!

"This is why they say 'the world is flat.'"

"The only thing we fear is sphere itself."