Fitness Misfit Gifts

"When I recommended you join a gym...I didn't mean as a member of the board!"

"I think I've found the most comfy jeans."

'And as my chart clearly shows, I don't know anything.'

'Excuse me, I'm going to talk on the cellphone while pretending you're not here.'

"Don't worry, I'm a doctor."

'If this is 'Office Team Day' why are we wearing different colours?'

"Just the galoshes and coat, Timmy."

'I hereby sentence you to three years of piano lessons.'

'Maybe you need to practice walking.'

"No, I've got nothing constructive to add. But I do know a funny joke I could tell."

"O.K., I'm off to do some running and off-key singing."

'Your medical coverage does not consider that a medical necessity.'

Tone Deaf and Can't Read Music - Please Give.

'I know it's my third doughnut, but it's okay. I'm using the Pilates method of dunking.'

Impersonal Trainer.

'I'm sorry, but I just don't think you're cut out to sell real estate.'

'Stan, wait!... Wrong game!'

"I'm pretty sure the definition leadership is the use of anger to motivate those who are already miserable."

"Hold on ! Hold on! When you said you'd played this game before at school...."

"Ah, Reid. You obviously didn't get my, 'you're fired' text."

"Of course at this point, the egg salad went bad in the sandwich machine."

"If music be the food of love, shut up."

"My goodness, Mr. Merryweather, we certainly did make a boo-boo with that prescription of yours!"

"How is the new hearing aid?"

All's well that ends well

'That was absolutely HORRIBLE! When can you start?'

'I was demoted and they're making me wear this hair shirt.'

"Harry's putting is not the only thing that stinks!"

'It's a case of wrongful arrest - you haven't had a heart attack.'

'I don't fit where I belong.'