Fitness Jokers Gifts

"I work out so I don't have to eat kale."

'I understand the concept, sir, but I think I'd do better if it were a donut.'

LA: 'I'm going to be late- the moving stairs broke down.'

I need something to hold my tummy in

"Was it something I said?"

I'm feeling a bit sluggish to tell you the truth!

'Be advised, son - learn the difference between a come-on and isometrics.'

"I think that form '10,000' steps may have been 9,999 too many!"

HEALTH CLUB, 'It's just a bunch of guys sitting around eating breakfast cereal.'

Circular Walk.

"Good news! You're in a great condition for a man of 60!"

"Exercise ball? No thanks, I'm growing my own."

"It's a new work-out video. It shows a mother chasing after three little children all day."

"If we carry them home we’ll get at least one workout."

10K Run: Smoker's Lane.

Bench Press Accident

"OK, ready to go again?"

Staff. Manager. So then you must say "I refuse to lift weights." Hey, that's not what I expected when I hired you to be a resistance training instructor!

'When the doctor told you to warm up before exercising, I don't think he meant with hot chocolate and hot cross buns.'

"I tried the C25k but prefer the 5k2C"

'His 5 hour energy drink timed out. If only he had taken it 3 seconds later.'

"I'm making him take a spin class."

" ... and if we finish pillaging early enough, we can still catch the evening Zumba class on the after deck."

"Why settle for itsy-bitsy when you could be swole as hell?"

The nutritional devils and angels on your shoulder.

Joe's Gym: 'Can anyone here open this jar of pickles!?'

"Yeah. I'm into fitness. Fittin' dis whole sammich in my mouth."

Musclesnakes just swallow the dumbbells.

Ants stealing from the picnic.

"Still on your left."

'Why are jogging on the spot?'

"I agree, it is important to look good, but wearing high heels during a workout may be a little counter productive."

Jeff was watching his weight.

'He wanted to know if anyone had ever brought out a keep-fat video.'

Fitness Club Founded in 1892