Financial Gossip Skeptic Gifts

He may overreacted to the gossip that the ship was sinking.

"I'm voting for Stephen because I cannot stand Katie's mother, she is so catty! Anyway-- how're your parents doing with the divorce?"

The truth is, Congressman, we didn't know it was wrong to screw people.

"I'm more of a 'How Jen stays thin' person than a 'Why Jen won't let Brad alone' person."

The transparent safe box of Panama

"...and she said 'MOO!'"

'Agreed, 40 years is a long time to wander around, but think of the travel expenses.'

"The economy's been worsening for a while, but people still don't feel it, Rudy." "...Which means we still have time to get in on the despair action." "Despair action"? "We're going to expand our menu. Add more comfort foods, more 'sale' items, debt consolidation loans..." "Nobody's dumb enough to get a debt consolidation loan from some random guy." "Ha ha hoo hoo hee-"

Vinnie's Repossessions: A Turtle has just had his shell repossessed

'John, I have to get going. Here's my views on politics, sports, and automobiles in case some of the boys come in later.'

'Okay, let the minutes show we're not absconding with the money until the economy improves...'

Where Ignorance is Bliss.

Help! Have to pay back a big world bank loan.

'I think we're setting the bar too low.'

'Bad news on Wall Street. The entire stock market has been downgraded to a 'junk' classification.'

"Maps to stars' rehab centers."

"So, Tom from accounting—you remember Tom, right? Anyway, Tom yells 'TMI, Gail!' Can you believe he said that?" "Textbook Tom."

"Thank you, and may the I.R.S. accept all your deductions."

'Vanity, thy name is Maple.'

'Our new simplified energy bills just have a few options starting with 'Grossly inflated' and progressing to the premium 'Bloodsucker' package. . .'

'The fourth quarter was no walk in the park. Especially for those who count on us to walk in the park.'

'It's a demonstration by retired CEOs who refuse to give up their bonuses.'

'Social media makes things so much easier to be a gossip."

'Botox...'

“Rumor has it, it’s happy hour.”

Your son has a genetic inability to calculate. This forecasts for him a brilliant career in the Ministry of Finance.

"Remember that lovely couple of scarlet macaws we met in Puerto Jiménez? They split up!"

"It was the unsubstantiated rumours that attracted me to you in the first place."

"We disagree with the president - we kinda like Robin Hood - we take from everyone and keep it - how much more successful can you get?"

Weditorials

"I don'y know who did her, but when she laughs the wrinkles go in very weird directions."

"We bring him gifts of gold, frankincense and mercantile mutual hedge fund options."

'The bad news is that we're only in it for the money.'

'The 'free market' economic theory is falling!'

'I wish there was some way we could reduce emissions here.'