Field Comedian Gifts

"Gesundheit."

'Keep me informed of the herds' mood.'

"No, I like the plan. Just saying, have you ever done any actual tunnelling?"

'He just burst into my campsite, and broke my banjo!'

'Henrietta is so self-confident.'

'Yes! The momentum's going to shift now. Our home fan is starting to make some noise!'

'How many times have I told you not to hit the ball with your head?'

'Some dogs are meant to be working dogs and some aren't.'

'Darn those neighbors. A cookie's missing.'

'Mother, there's something you're not telling me about that alien invasion, I can feel it!'

'Pass the salt, will ya, buddy?'

Alas poor Daisy, I knew her well!

"Static cling."

"Don't be so dramatic. You tell me you're pregnant every day?"

'For Sale by Neighbor'

"That was definitely mine."

Emergency room doctor about half cow: 'Farming accident. Be sensitive - she's beside herself.'

'..The wolves have got the sheep pinned against their own 1-yard line again!'

'MEN! We've got a fire at the cattle shed! Do we want rare, medium or well done?'

Worse case of chicken pox I've ever seen!

"I call it 'Moona Lisa'."

'With proper flossing there's no reason for hens to not have teeth.'

'I promise, you're not crossing to the Dark Side.'

"Ok, let's try it one last time. It's 'Ahhhhhh'..."

'As you can see - it doesn't pay to badmouth the quarterback.'

Grassy breath?

'Mr. President, you have a phone call. It's the First Hen.'

Cow asks the horse for the carrot.

'Bad news is Tim Turkey is dead, the good news is I've made a wish!'

"I get aroused when I see you in leather."

Burn All Your Garden Rubbish

'She says her stomachs ache.'

A centi-stampede.