Festive Saver Gifts

The Spirit of Christmas Presents.

Shopping dilemma.

Thanks to her cat-cam, Cheryl was able to keep her furniture from being shredded while she was at work.

"As you can see, I've alphabetized the items, presents owing if you will, so if you can digitally initial here, here, here, here and here and sign there. Thank you. See you December 24."

"I'm going to miss it when they stop warning us"

The Gardener's Holiday: Don't leave produce behind you to perish.

"Well, of course it's plastic!"

Global warming causes widespread flooding, but fortunately scientists were able to locate the giant plug on the ocean floor.

Yes, dear, I remembered the coupons and saved a few dollars. The Adventures of Marriedman.

"At this rate I'll be delivering all gift certificates, gift cards and I.O.U.s!"

"Will you only promise the children toys that can be brought at this store?"

Coastguard

'Oh - It's you.'

One young wife asking another if she finds it more economical to do her own cooking.

From trash to treasure

Tarzan's trees being chopped down.

"Has your husband been exposed to Christmas at all?"

Rescuing the NHS for Christmas

Piggy Bank has Bitcoin in mouth

"Well, here comes shorts weather."

'Someone call 9-1-1!!!'

'Me…me…catch me!'

"People seem to be saying, Christmas is early, much earlier than they did last year."

'Rudolph, your nose!'

"I didn't hire a photographer. I thought we'd save a few bob by just taking, wedding selfies."

'What I like about Christmas is that wonderful feeling of freedom when it's all over.'

"Get some of the firm's other deadwood and form a carolling group."

Two children walking on the beach and carrying their sand buckets. One says, 'I'll trade you two tar balls for a syringe.'

"You see spots in front of you? Have you cleaned your glasses lately?"

'In this district, Constable, you can't be too careful!'

'As long as they're being fished to extinction, we might as well be the ones to do it.'

"C'mon, Phil! Before all the good stuff's gone!"

"Lousy elves are on strike again. You people gift wrap?"

Santa's in/out boxes read: Ho and Ho Ho respectively.

"Any discount to the trade?"