Festive Preparer Gifts

"People seem to be saying, Christmas is early, much earlier than they did last year."

"As you can see, I've alphabetized the items, presents owing if you will, so if you can digitally initial here, here, here, here and here and sign there. Thank you. See you December 24."

Christmas tree with wadded up lights.

Halloween may be a little different this year.

Frozen Turkey: "I hate to bother you on a holiday but I'm freezing out here. Do you have a heated enclosed space I could rest inside for four to five hours?"

'Thanksgiving's no holiday for turkeys or the women who cook them.'

Turkey Autopsy

"Whoa. There's a huge crack down here." "Tell me about it."

"At this rate I'll be delivering all gift certificates, gift cards and I.O.U.s!"

"Will you only promise the children toys that can be brought at this store?"

Jack and the Snowman.

Making Christmas Pudding.

"Hold still, it's a programme about making your own tv cabinet."

Thanksgiving: The holiday where aluminum foil is king!

'Do you have a traditional Christmas dinner, but for a lacto-vegan fruitarian?'

Christmas escape plan

"It's a snow-grandad!"

'Where were you on the night of October 31st?'

"Dad, I'll assemble yours if you assemble mine."

'They can be a real menace at this time of year.'

Prosecco and Pudding

"Can't talk now, I'm dicing with death, we're doing stir-fry."

"Tell Santa that Rudolph's check engine light is on."

'I can't talk now. I'm in the annual meeting.'

"Oh my, I've really fallen behind on the paperwork."

"Get some of the firm's other deadwood and form a carolling group."

'Some country that doesn't have Thanksgiving!'

'In this district, Constable, you can't be too careful!'

Holiday Shopping

'New Year's Eve is definitely a time for reflection...and it's usually my face in the punch bowl.'

"Eggnog?"

'Dressing the Salad. Why?'

'Merry Christmas' Fairy climbing her way up a Christmas tree

Christmas Pudding Girl.