Festive Saver Pillows

The Spirit of Christmas Presents.

Shopping dilemma.

"As you can see, I've alphabetized the items, presents owing if you will, so if you can digitally initial here, here, here, here and here and sign there. Thank you. See you December 24."

"I'm going to miss it when they stop warning us"

The Gardener's Holiday: Don't leave produce behind you to perish.

Global warming causes widespread flooding, but fortunately scientists were able to locate the giant plug on the ocean floor.

"At this rate I'll be delivering all gift certificates, gift cards and I.O.U.s!"

"Will you only promise the children toys that can be brought at this store?"

Coastguard

'Oh - It's you.'

One young wife asking another if she finds it more economical to do her own cooking.

From trash to treasure

Piggy Bank has Bitcoin in mouth

"Has your husband been exposed to Christmas at all?"

Rescuing the NHS for Christmas

"Well, here comes shorts weather."

'Someone call 9-1-1!!!'

"People seem to be saying, Christmas is early, much earlier than they did last year."

'Me…me…catch me!'

"Get some of the firm's other deadwood and form a carolling group."

'What I like about Christmas is that wonderful feeling of freedom when it's all over.'

"I didn't hire a photographer. I thought we'd save a few bob by just taking, wedding selfies."

'Rudolph, your nose!'

Two children walking on the beach and carrying their sand buckets. One says, 'I'll trade you two tar balls for a syringe.'

'In this district, Constable, you can't be too careful!'

"You see spots in front of you? Have you cleaned your glasses lately?"

Santa's in/out boxes read: Ho and Ho Ho respectively.

"Any discount to the trade?"

The True Meaning of Christmas

"C'mon, Phil! Before all the good stuff's gone!"

'As long as they're being fished to extinction, we might as well be the ones to do it.'

Obsessive-Compulsive Santa