Festive Feaster Pillows

'After that 24 hour beer and fruit cake binge, you need a radical detox!'

"We had this last year."

The need to run from the table screaming, has reached it's peak about an hour ago and has now subsided into a tolerable level of anguish where I only occasionally want to smash a fork into my eye socket. . .

Turducken, Piecaken, Scaletalkin'

Wife leaving note 'midnight mass' on husbands distended stomache as she leaves house.

Too full after after Christmas dinner!

"I'm afraid I'm going to have to cancel your Thanksgiving."

"He's say's he's eaten 200,000,000 mince pies, drank 150,000,000 glasses of wine, eaten 300,000,000..."

"Venison... why do you ask?"

"He's taken buzzed to a whole new level."

'Santa recalled thousands of toys ― he delivered them to kids who're in fact naughty.'

Happy Holidays from Sanitary Claus!

"A GPS! Thanks guys! It's exactly what I need to guide my sleigh...you know, in light of that unfortunate hunting accident."

Cut out and keep your own Christmas Caterer.

Flight attendant piloting Santa's sleigh.

"I'd like a partridge in a pear tree, 2 turtle doves, 3 French hens, 4 calling birds and 7 swans a swimming."

Christmas Pets

'Ya gotta love the way this farmer gets into Halloween spirit.'

Santa Dog

"I don’t know, Margaret. She looks like the type who makes exotic stuffings."

Hold those deer to you near to you this Christmas.

"When it comes to turkeys, Mom, you sure know your stuff-ing."

"We'll see how it goes. It's Santa's first year with the genetically modified deer."

Classic Emojis for sale.

"Don’t you think it’s about time you stopped insisting on your uncle Bill being here for Christmas?"

Easter Egg Delivery

Merry Kissmas

O Christmas Tea

"I didn't get anything I asked for last year so I want your acceptance of this year's list to be notarized."

'What do you expect? A red bulb burned out, and you're free till Christmas.'

'Christmas dinner's almost ready dear.'

Dog's Christmas list.

It took a while but Henk finally did lose his Christmas bum.

"Santa's elves have to eat, you know."

Santa Claus and the Snowman Cross Paths