Festive Cynics Pillows

'Christmas is coming ... a hop, skip and a jump ahead of the bill collector'

Santa in Lineup.

"Christmas - what a fuss eh?"

"'How We Die' - fabulous!"

"I don't believe in you!"

'I hate all holidays!'

"That's Bridgeport from legal, he's got the consent forms."

"This year let's choose a Christmas card design that reflects the situation the country is in. Let's go for a design that says: Bah humbug!"

"I've never hated Christmas, just people."

"Sales of our festive toilet cleaner have gone through the floor...it makes you worry that people have forgotten what the festive season is ALL ABOUT!"

"So, Mr. Claus, there IS a Virginia!"

"I just keep getting this urge to say 'Bah Humbug'!"

'Houston..Er..I don't know how to tell you this..'

'Despite what they sing, I don't think Christmas is really the season to be jolly...'

'Ms Phelps, can you help me? I seem to have misplaced my Christmas spirit.'

"There was no Christmas Party."

'Free gifts to every kid in the whole world? -- What are you running for?'

'Don't try to kid me - that whole Rudolph thing is just a publicity stunt, isn't it?'

'Frankly, I don't know what to believe. They say if it sounds too good to be true, it usually is.'

'... But, if he knows when I'm sleeping and when I'm awake, isn't that an infringement of my right to privacy?'

"Just another silly programme this Christmas."

'I'm really getting tired of all these Christmas commercials.'

"There are never sleigh tracks on our roof, or soot tracks on our carpet. Maybe you're just fake news?"

Scrooge: only-23-days until day after Christmas.

Christmas Sale Special

"There are more things I'm ungrateful than grateful for. Why can't we have a holiday for that?"

"You know if I've been naughty or nice? Do you have my phone tapped?

Baaa...humbug.

Naughty Or Nice? Didn't You Read My Blog, 'Playing By The Rules Is For Dummies?'

'If you believe Christmas is over-commercialised, press the Sponsored by Cola red button.'

Wallowing in elf pity...

'Don't try to kid me - that whole Rudolph thing is just a publicity stunt, isn't it?'

"Bah, humbug! It's not just for Christmas anymore."

"Bearing in mind that Santa has fact checkers, have you been a good little boy?"