Feng Shui Fan Gifts

'It may not be your feng shui, but it's my feng shui.'

'You've got, like, a Feng Shui problem with your pancreas, dude.'

Feng Shui classes / How to say Feng Shui Classes

'I want you to sit up front right by my desk. It's not because I want to keep an eye on you. It's a feng shui thing.'

"Good afternoon. Feng-shui consultation bureau."

'I'm new. How's the Feng Shui here?'

Man reading book 'Feng Shui for Micro Apartments.'

I read an article about using space efficiency. I started storing and storing...

'...yes, well according to my feng shui book, this is where it should go.'

"Just have to be different,don't you ?"

'Hey, that's for MY inner peace, go get your own!'

"Jack sensed that Susan was planning to rearrange the furniture again."

"No, we decided the west corner was for political posturing; this is the 'rocking back-and-forth in futility' corner."

'...yes, well according to my feng shui book, this is where it should go.'

Feng Shui for Farmers

'To maximize student achievement, the Feng Shui consultant advises one student per classroom.'

Yes... this breaks up the space nicely.

"I hope you realize this is bad feng shui!"

"I can't find my chi!"

The Feng Shui Fish

"Fish needs a bigger bowl."

"Another dry scotch Manhattan, Mike. Make it a double."

Fish, singing: 'I'm a sole man..'

"...so it appears we were talking to his butt that entire time."

Fish with a human in a bowl.

Fish Tank Label - Corporation Fish

"This is a great school but it wasn't my first choice."

I told you we were late!

"I love these old decorations!"

'They took my Science Fair Award away. They said I ate too much fish, which is brainfood. So, it was like I was on mental steroids.'

Fish, singing: 'I'm a sole man..'

'I just know I'm going to get a bite soon.'

...My feng shui would be incompatible with your sumo wrestling.

"Larry, nooo! Don't look into the BOWL!!!"

'Well, back to the old drawing board.'