Feng Shui Fanatics Gifts

'Man, that freaks me out I've lived here over a year and every time I come home that lamp's in a different place,'

"Honey! The puppy just placed a new water element on the floor. Do you want me to clean it up or just balance the Feng Shui with a fire element?"

"I knew that book would come in useful one day"

'We want to adopt a kid. Do you have a choice our feng shui consultant can look at?'

"I read somewhere that truffles are a gateway fungus."

'You've got, like, a Feng Shui problem with your pancreas, dude.'

...My feng shui would be incompatible with your sumo wrestling.

Japanese woman in minimalist house reads 'How to Clutter Your Life'

'Davinia! Your Feng Shui person's here.'

"Well, your feng shui isn't my feng shui."

'He keeps grounding out the energy flow.'

'It may not be your feng shui, but it's my feng shui.'

"Don't these fools realize they're violating every principle of feng-shui?"

"My once perky chicken breasts hang like flapjacks, I don't lay eggs anymore, I'm burning up with hot flashes, I'm...."

"Love your feng shui!"

'Well Miss Hayward, your suggestion of trying Feng Shui didn't work.'

Visual Gag: Dracula reading a Fang Shui book. The Vampires version of 'Feng' Shui

"That Feng Shui class I took is paying off!"

Frat House Feng Shui

'I want you to sit up front right by my desk. It's not because I want to keep an eye on you. It's a feng shui thing.'

'Eddie, you've tried aggressive growth, multicaps, small caps, blue chips...now maybe it's time to try a support group for underperforming portfolios?'

Feng Sushi

'It's definitely a tattoo that I can reflect on in the future.'

'To maximize student achievement, the Feng Shui consultant advises one student per classroom.'

'A surgeon operated on the wrong side of the operating room, and is being charged with medical feng shui malpractice.'

'I moved the computer and phone off my desk. You wouldn't understand. It's a Feng Shui thing and it has successfully reduced my job related stress.'

"Good afternoon. Feng-shui consultation bureau."

Feng Shui for Farmers

Feng Shui Centre - We Have Moved

'Oh my God! Call the Feng Shui expert!'

"Feng Shwoops!"

I love what you've done with the place.

"I'll take this Feng Shui for Cats. And spare me the eye-rolls, please."

'It's bad news for the cabin boy.'

"It's hard to trust those Beanbirds. They're always 'up' to something!"