Fearless Paddler Gifts

canoeist on the edge of a waterfall, stopping himself falling with his oar.

The aliens froze, gripped by a primal fear. This time there would be no abduction.

"Holy cow, Kenny, look at the size of that thing! It's huge, I tell ya'! And the teeth! The teeth!"

"Getting the hang of it?"

Mountain climbers face a closed route.

'I think it's time we came to grips with our addiction to buying kayaks.'

'I've got a cape. I think I can make it.'

"Some day you'll look back at this and remember me as the person who taught you to fear water."

The noise from the basement was probably nothing – but if it was, she was a sacrifice her older brothers were willing to make.

'This is going to be the best day ever!'

"Norman's really into wild paddling."

'I hate the new building inspector. He can smell fear a mile away.'

Principal to teacher with trap door below her desk: 'The board thinks people teach better under pressure.'

"Are there sharks in the water?"

"Dad, it's gonna take more than that to scare me."

Clown Nightmares

'Isn't it time you got over your silly fear of water?'

A giant diamond hurtles through space toward a population of very conflicted women.

'Don't be afraid!...Bobo's just going to fix the teeth a little tighter.'

'I don't think my parents are ready for me to come out of the closet just yet.'

"... and you've had this irrational fear that evil clowns were hiding under your bed since you were how old?"

"It's just like that thing you've got under your bed, only this one is for old people."

"I'm helping him conquer his morbid fear of water."

'What do you mean your paddling trip went so well you lost track of time? You were supposed to be home over a year ago!'

'Don't worry, he's very friendly.'

'Don't worry, Mrs. Shumberg, your son has years of experience doing this. He knows just what he's doing.'

"Remember what we were told, stand perfectly still."

Lady asking a man to Jump over a gate before her

"I'm scared of germs lurking under my bed."

'Took your advice and decided to face my fears. I still get panic attacks, but at least now there's a darn good reason.'

'Any sign of a yeti there, Fred?'

'Our office is on the 14th floor, Peters... you should forget about rising sea levels.'

"I can handle the big cats, but the clowns creep me out."

"See? There's no monster in the corner—it's just a pile of old skulls."

"You don't have any silly thing about snakes, do you?"