Fate Fan Gifts

"It's curious. No matter how hard I try, I can't find your life line."

'This wasn't quite the fairytale ending that Colin had anticipated...'

Your enemy is defeated by Fate

'I don't care what the Hares have. Dial-Up is good enough for us!'

"Eat my dust!"

'For the first 500 calories of what we are about to receive, make us truly thankful.'

A cow goes to the Fortune Teller - 'I can see two all beef patties, special sauce, lettuce, cheese, pickles, onions, on a sesame seed bun...!'

Two vending machines for fisherman: 'Live Bait' next to 'Dead as a Doornail Bait'

'The next case Your Honor, is a palimony suit. The ant vs the grasshopper.'

"Even if I did believe that he was communicating through you. I'm afraid it's too late to change the will now."

'Have you tried a licensed health practicioner?'

'Thanks to the internet, I can telecommute a few days a week now: I don't need to waste so much time travelling...'

Drug Testing Unit: 'Uh Oh!'

The tortoise and the hare are in a shoe store trying on shoes in preparation for their race.

"I think feeling a certain amount of anxiety over the up coming race with the Hare is perfectly normal!"

"I didn't hear the full story, but you came from either the stork or ebay."

"I see you on a beach..."

Your Palm

I swear, we rode right through the town and my mistress Lady Godiva wasn't wearing a thing...

"He's a widowed eighty-year-old billionaire with a 'Do Not Resuscitate' tattoo...what's not to like?"

"Forget about tall and handsome. What about portfolio 10 year highs and lows?"

"It looks as though plan A has backfired!"

"Who's there?"

A psychic predicts the discovery of gluten.

Yeah, yeah, yeah - tell my editor the fables are almost done, and she'll have them as soon as

The tortoise and hare

Meet Thy Doom

'No, I don't want to change my long distance phone company, and,,, Yes, I should have known it was you calling'

Child puts his finger in a dam to prevent it flooding.

'IT'S NOT YOU!'

The tortoise and the hare - Aesop's fables.

'Hey, Ruby, want to give this guy an estimate?'

'What a twist of fate!'

Because I don't need my crystal ball to know what will happen if you don't clean your room.

“It’s 2025 Roger, I didn’t think I’d still be seeing the lockdown beard..”