Fast Food Employee Gifts

"$15 an hour!...I demand $15 an hour!"

'Will that be for here or to go - and if it's to go, can you take me with you?'

'I'm really pressed for time this morning. Could you just go ahead and pour that in my lap for me?'

Fast Food Restaurant Employees Discuss a Defibrillator. 'Maybe we should keep it under the counter.'

Cloud Cuckoo Land, Hamburger bar, "I don't like the look of this Charlie"

If a bunch of crazy red headed clowns come out that door...Run like you've never ran before!

Kung food restaurant (Waiter flies through the air bringing the food).

'I guess there are lots of rotten jobs, Gramma...I hope I don't have to clean the taco hut forever.'

"Gimme a large cheeseburger, regular fries and a diet root beer!"

Man sees sign as he exits bathroom: 'Employees Often Wash Hands'.

'You need an education or you will wind up in some fast food place.'

'I've already been recruited by one of the top fast-food chains in the country!'

"Yes I know, and you dropped sauce on your shirt."

'Be honest. Does this double bacon cheeseburger with large fries and shake make me look fat?'

'Now that's what I call a kebab... a skewer with whole pies!'

"And I'll have that lightly sedated, please."

"Two burgers, two fries, two martinis—and we'll have those to go."

A golden Big Boy holding a plate of poop

"I cook the sausages in French mineral water, I wear a French beret and I can call you 'Monsieur'."

"Mom, I'm at work – let me call you back after I finish stocking milk for wealthy vegans who like beet juice in their meat alternatives so they can still get that bloody effect when cooking without guilt."

"I'll have the drum an sea bass, the house salad and the techno nachos!"

Menu Dating

Another day in the Splenda mines

'Is this still America?'

"With all due respect, Sire, the Pizza King sends his kindest regards."

'Tomorrow's special is fish, so wear the flounder suit.'

Waitress to church leader: 'It's your daily bread, Pastor. Remember? You ordered the prayer breakfast.'

"Our new automated workers need a little fine tuning, but they're coming along..."

'The economy being what it is, we've had to make a few changes in your retirement plan. . .'

'Yes, I am impressed at how fast you got here, but where's my pizza?'

"Honey, have you seen my onions?"

'I was hoping for a better bonus this year.'

'Which would be more Zen ? a pizza with nothing, or a pizza with everything?'