Fast Bowler Survivor Gifts

Cricketer battered after facing an over from a fast bowler.

'This has the makings of their toughest season ever.'

'I'm so bored - nothing ever happens around here!'

Goldfish bowl on raft...

"Hmm...I can see a best-selling book and a movie deal out of this..."

Desert Island Mishap

'Being stuck on a desert island is one thing, but being struck on a desert island with a hoarder...'

"Sorry, but there aren't enough life jackets to go around."

"Remember that time I let you steer the boat and we crashed and had to swim here to die? Remember?"

"I thought I was a hoarder, but it turns out I'm a prepper."

'Not likely - the last time I went in one of those, it sank!'

Help! Send fishing tackle!

'Go and hunt for your own lunch. Who do you think I am, Ray Mears?!'

'It's a slow trap.'

"I'm realizing how useless I'd be in a post apocalyptic world - All I do is draw cartoons."

"I swear, if you say 'I'm bored' one more time . . . "

In case of stock market crash break glass.

'Wow, that shift almost got us.'

'It's so frustrating -- all our coupons are expiring!'

Shipwrecked.

"This isn't just about the wolf anymore, is it?"

"And now Survivor Six...walking through your kid's room barefoot in the dark..."

'You mean you don't have a bowling alley on board? And you call yourself a cruise ship?'

Last mirage for the next 20 miles.

'Now what?'

"Hey, if we're getting laid off, it's every man for himself!"

"The sign says you can swim to civilization from here, but that sounds unlikely."

Hammock for Man on Desert Island with Single Tree

'Think about it: If you eat me now, you won't get an egg every day...'

'... And when Brad Pitt told you that it was this way to the waterhole, you didn't think that you may have been hallucinating?'

"Professor, just how long did you say that evolution thing takes?"

"This is ridiculous. It was an accident."

'What are YOU doing here?'

'Any sign of a low tide?'

'We've been offered NATO membership.'