Farming Humor Gifts

"Is that a new watch?"

Bureaucracy in Food Production

'Wake up, dear...did you order extra milk?!'

A sure sign of rain

"We can do this the easy way or we can do it the hard way ..."

"I'm an enigma!"

'How are you at thinking outside the flocks?'

'Watch out, Dewey! Cow pie!'

'Wool ewe pullover yourself together.'

Phoning a Busy Sheep: 'Sorry I can't get to the phone right now, please make an animal noise after the bleat!'

"All good: This egg looks healthy as well..."

'I think you need an electrician here, rather than a veterinarian.'

'This is your third speeding ticket in a week. Sure your horse didn't get into some genetically modified hay?'

'I LOVE YOU GUYS!' 'She's been drinking again!'

'Gee, at these prices you'd think they would tie the feedbags on for you.'

'Thanks girls: Boy it's cold today!'

Her Poo-Fu is strong!

"We're raising them for turkey bacon."

'He always gets that way when I ask him about our retirement plan,'

The Moo-Walk

'Don't worry about retirement Irma: There's more to life than just laying eggs...'

Wordilly Durdillies - A cow putt

Clancy Strip: Out of Business

'Culled?! That's a relief...I thought you said we were gonna be killed!'

"It's the fabled Mongolian Herd!"

'No thank you, I'm on a diet: I've noticed that the fat ones disappear first...'

It's not enough just to 'milk me'...what's my motivation? Do I want to be milked?

'Miaow??'

"You call it milking, I call it groping."

'Will someone fetch me that new dairy maid?'

"I have four stomachs and one of them always seems to be hungry.''

Peripheral vision cow

'Hey Phil...Thanks again for that little barnyard speech you gave last week about Farmer John's unimpeachable character and good intentions...'

I LOVE what you've done with the place!

Pork Sausage.