Farmers' Humor Gifts

"Grandpa fatty died a heroic death - he bit through the main power cable in the slaughterhouse."

'Wake up, dear...did you order extra milk?!'

A sure sign of rain

"We can do this the easy way or we can do it the hard way ..."

'How are you at thinking outside the flocks?'

'Watch out, Dewey! Cow pie!'

"All good: This egg looks healthy as well..."

Phoning a Busy Sheep: 'Sorry I can't get to the phone right now, please make an animal noise after the bleat!'

'I think you need an electrician here, rather than a veterinarian.'

'This is your third speeding ticket in a week. Sure your horse didn't get into some genetically modified hay?'

'Gee, at these prices you'd think they would tie the feedbags on for you.'

'I LOVE YOU GUYS!' 'She's been drinking again!'

'Thanks girls: Boy it's cold today!'

"My job is not as easy as it looks: You have to learn about astronomy and celestial mechanics to be able to accurately predict sunrise and sunset..."

The Moo-Walk

Sheep has it's fur shorn into a tutu.

"It's the fabled Mongolian Herd!"

"Is that a new watch?"

Wordilly Durdillies - A cow putt

"We're raising them for turkey bacon."

'Culled?! That's a relief...I thought you said we were gonna be killed!'

Her Poo-Fu is strong!

'He always gets that way when I ask him about our retirement plan,'

Thanks for the heads up on the gelatinous cube!

'No thank you, I'm on a diet: I've noticed that the fat ones disappear first...'

'Miaow??'

Peripheral vision cow

"You call it milking, I call it groping."

It's not enough just to 'milk me'...what's my motivation? Do I want to be milked?

One of their favourite games was to pull the wool over their eyes.

"What is that lovely fragrance you're wearing, Penelope?"

Production in times of pandemic

Blackmail is such an ugly word...Don't you agree?