Fan Of History Jokes Gifts

'Where did you last see your club?'

'I was hoping you'd sign them 'To my good buddy Moses!''

'Yes, all at once!'

"Bonk!"

"Perhaps it wasn't so wise to bring Frosty along!"

'Do you know what's worse than being a mummy? Being a mummy with prostate!'

"So who ordered the 'Yo-ho-ho and a bottle of rum on a dead mans chest'?"

Young costermonger trying to sell to a gentleman.

'We're getting closer - That's a goldfish.'

'Yes, the colours are wonderful. But he only does five pages per month, and he doesn't support PostScript.'

"You ever get the feeling the posse's starting to lose focus?"

'Oh no. The building inspector. He's worse than the Pharaoh.'

'I can not tell a lie concerning the cherry tree: mistakes were made. However, I must consult with my spin doctors before saying more.'

Ed Revere, Spam Courier

Servant Painting Targets Around Arrows Shot by a King

Shakspeare a little altered. - 'He lived not wisely, but too well.'

"Oh my god, you guys, a puppy!"

"At first I thought a full size spare was a good idea, but now..."

Woman Walking a Trojan Horse

'What a Neanderthal! Ork doesn't know his putter from his driver.'

'I like a man in a suit.'

Mothers Pride and Prejudice.

'It wasn't like this when I left it!'

Man in the stocks on his typewriter.

"Just a minute - I'm uploading."

"Drat! A flat tyre. . ."

"Uh oh! I just remembered we were supposed to pick up the midwife."

'What's this, lad? Didn't I tell you not to carry anything heavy!'

"Oh yes, apparently this one is a copyright symbol."

Pillaging For Mom

"I don't know about you, but ever since we invented language, I've been getting a lot less sex."

Why the Romans stopped serving alcohol at sporting events.

'The King replaced me with easy listening!'

'The first commandment is: Thou shalt not shoot the messenger.'

'What I've just has my teeth whitened,'