Family Members Gifts

"That's strange. I remember it differently, in a way that aligns with my world view and casts me in a positive light."

'Ms. Avery left each one of you, ten million dollars...unfortunately, her estate is only worth seven dollars and sixteen cents.'

'all of you, except a party named 'Fido', may now leave.'

'The Doctor says you can be discharged - so I've brought you a list of jobs you can do when you get home!'

Family all doing different things around the breakfast table.

The Cohens assert their Jewish identity during the holiday season

'You know what they say. . . 'If your dog is fat - you aren't getting enough exercise.''

'I inherited therefore I am'

Angels looking down from a cloud "It's when it comes to the contesting of the will that you find out who your friends were."

Litter Pick

"Although the estate will be distributed equally, your father wanted you all to know that Keith was his favorite, followed by..."

'You want to speak to the head of the household? There is no head of the household. My parents are into shared decision making.'

"Anyone who isn't specifically named in the will still receives one of these valuable gift bags."

"We can't pull the plug. We're all still on her insurance."

'First, let's see him program a DVD recorder.'

'And finally. To my Nephew, Sid, who never laughed at my jokes, har de har har!'

"I brought chips and cookies to snack on and baby carrots to sit unopened on the blanket."

"As the executor for your mother's estate, let me say that she loved each of you, but she also loved Las Vegas."

'Hold up everyone. I read that last part wrong. She wants you to divide the 'cash' equally.'

"Dear Mum, please stop sending me food parcels..."

'Look who came back for the family reunion.'

'For heaven's sake! The budgie went back in his cage half-an-hour ago!'

Stork Swinging Baby.

'I must be slipping in my old age. Yesterday I completely forgot to annoy my parents.'

"...an this is my extended family."

"Your aunt has bequeathed to you her collection of toilet paper, soap and towels from 385 hotels from all over the world."

Even though we have to keep our distance...

"Oh no - more covid bad news!"

"I'm disabling autocorrect, because it reminds me too much of my mother-in-law."

"Sorry, Dad."

The First 3-D Thanksgiving

"You've all been written out of the will in favor of more dynamic characters."

Going back for the Holidays

"We wanted you both to know — we've adopted a humpback whale."

Clinton's Ides of April