Family Heroics Appreciator Pillows

'Well, my Dad doesn't care how big you are, Mr. Jones. He'll still knock your block off!'

"I'm sorry, Ms. Cole is busy balancing family and career. Can I take a message and have her call you back?"

celebrating a birth.

"Great job of acting! You really appeared excited about Aunt May's 'famous' green bean casserole."

"Can I multi-task? As a single mom I'm both the bread-winner and bread-baker!"

Miracle Mom #5,293

"Why, Mr. Larsen! We were about ready to give up on you."

Look on the bright side...they'll probably name a disease after you.

"I'm stuffed. But in a good way."

'This is a personal insult to me and my family. Paulie, word is you regifted that horse's head I gave you last month. . .'

"Dad, will you play judge and tell me if Raymond or Joey is the father of my baby doll?"

"Bah! in my day bands knew how to play their computers properly. Like Kraftwerk"

Dad's home

"Mom...There's nothing to do..."

"Look, Mommy. Puppy already knows a trick! What should we call him?" "How about 'Scooter.'"

'I've been disrespectful again, Dad.'

Thank You to Vaccinators

Coronavirus

"Kosovo, Iraq, Afghanistan...Sarge Higgins is one hell of a tough guy! But he wouldn't have a chance against my mom - she raised three kids!"

'I already had one bath today! You want my skin to wear out?'

'Any chance of getting a financial advance on my loose tooth?'

"I can't believe Tia Carmen is working in our cafeteria! This bites! How can she do this to me?"

"Nothing like taking a few weeks off to spend time with the kids Eh!"

"I married a girl with two mums and ended up with two mothers-in-law."

"Mom, Dad, am I adopted?"

"Before it's too late, Dad, I want to take the opportunity to say 'I love you.'"

'Don't bother your father. Let him enjoy his Father's Day.'

Fear

'I'm afraid I have some bad news.'

"Gosh grandma, you must be over a million in dog years!"

The Faith-Based Family

Little Known Superheroes:'Open-jar man', 'Get keys out of a locked car guy', 'Captain reach it for you' and 'Smell this to see if its going bad guy'.