Family Appreciator Pillows

World's Greatest Mom...I approve of this message.

Sometimes he just stood back and admired the breathtaking scenery of his life.

"As a friend, I pray you rest in peace. As a dog, I really want to dig you up."

"I'd like to thank my parents and my creditors for making this possible."

'Okay, Mom. I'm sorry I re-gifted one of the kidneys you gave me.'

celebrating a birth.

'As a token of friendship we present to you this sacred albino fawn.' 'We sailed all the way across the Atlantic Ocean, and all you have is light deer?!'

"Oh, how I wish the season would start!"

And when we came home, the entire anthill was gone... It was awful, Mom - but at least Harry and I still have each other...

"Dad, will you play judge and tell me if Raymond or Joey is the father of my baby doll?"

"I'm stuffed. But in a good way."

"Mom, this is Sarah, the friend I was telling you about."

'Ted, isn't it about time you sorted out your deer-gut?'

"Mom...There's nothing to do..."

A Mom and Pop Operation

'Hey, scratch my back and I'll scratch your back.'

"Finally, it's Spring! I missed you! Let's go and play!"

'I've been disrespectful again, Dad.'

'I already had one bath today! You want my skin to wear out?'

'You haven't changed a bit Perkins.'

'Look what my son gave me!'

'Thank you, my dear, for taking the runt of my litter in holy matrimony...'

'Creative right?'

A man opens his curtains to wake up his cats.

Life is just four letters...

'You guys are real friends!'

'Fish or chicken?' - Pilot has the choice of 2 types of airline food at home.

'Any chance of getting a financial advance on my loose tooth?'

"OK, class, for Hispanic Heritage Month, I want you draw a Latino hero."

"I can't believe Tia Carmen is working in our cafeteria! This bites! How can she do this to me?"

Life's Rarest Things

"Mom, Dad, am I adopted?"

"I'm thankful I get a 4 day school holiday for Thanksgiving."

The Battle of Life - Part the First

"Before it's too late, Dad, I want to take the opportunity to say 'I love you.'"