Fall Chore Humorists Gifts

Leaf duel.

"Oh my gosh, honey! Look out!"

Don't be fooled by the theatrics. She'll only suck your sap!

"I hope that's low calorie eye of newt."

"No, Doris, not implants!"

"We're gonna entertain you for exactly the next 30 minutes."

Santa Claus You Are Welcome.

"I feel like tearing of all your clothes and putting them in the washing machine."

Macbeth: Take Two

"Sorry. My blood sugar has just been running a little low lately."

"I was ironing the curtains and fell out of the window..!"

Ghost puddle

"I love November - the crunch of leaves underfoot... the crisp air... the holiday markets..." "... it getting dark by mid-afternoon..." "Okay, that's less enjoyable."

"I'd like to buy a BOWEL."

"We're freaky February hares, the mad march ones have vanished due to global warming."

Job Safety - Pumpkin.

The following is a paid political announcement.

'I'm not a 'Ghost', I'm an Ectoplasmic American.'

'Let's skip Mr. Arnold's house. He's the dog catcher.'

Fancy a pint?

"UK government aren’t budging boss. Sole supplier or not under the new procurement regulations our new contract has to have three KPIs..."

'You complete me.'

Pre-Winter Ennui-'Hon, did you have the furnace checked?'

"If you want to play fetch with the dog, throw your own @#&% arm."

"So, are you predicting an early spring?"

"I love this time of year."

'It's a snow mobile.'

Snooze Alarm for Mole.

'I'm dressed as a vat inspector.'

Weather today.

"You've got to help her ... she has developed a fear of flying."

A few Halloween costume ideas.

Candy Corn Dracula

'Been biting drunken bitches again, have we?'

"By the way, does anything other than 'trouble' rhyme with 'bubble'?"