Faithful Franchiser Gifts

'A ten commandments franchise.'

Christian and Born again Christian...

'Sorry mate. Your church doesn't meet the minimum building code.'

"I was a stockbroker first, but when I realized how much time I spent praying, I figured, what the heck?"

Couple beyond prayer - need divine intervention.

Primordial Schmooze

"I'm Bobby. If you like the lemonade, perhaps you'd like to invest in the 'Jimmy's Lemonade' franchise, listed in NASDAQ..."

"And the Lord said, 'You know, it takes a ton of money to run a place like this.'"

'And now, concerning the special collection...'

'Here's your lemonade and here's some descriptive literature about my franchising opportunities.'

Minister Starts at a New Church

'I bet he gets a better rate of interest than me!'

Wall St Baptist: 'Life is exactly like the stock market exchange and we each have our own portfolio to manage.'

The church of our lady of wall street.

'We hope to invest in a few start-ups with national franchise potential.'

Man prays: 'Lord help me to be humble, and I want that by 10am Monday.'

"I think it's the company logo."

'We would like to visit with you about the possibility of expanding our franchise...'

'You may be serving Him up there, but don't forget...I'm boss down here.'

'I thought about leaving once, but I couldn't quit the habit.'

"This is great. This could be franchised."

'Could I get back to you on that one? My broker says my stock went back up!'

God's lil' fix-it shop.

"Sigh. Remember when Star Wars used to mean something?"

Power and the Glory tools

''Two roads diverged in a wood, and I -- I took the one less traveled by'...which was a helluva dumb place for me to launch a burger franchise!'

'Mate, you've just paid two grand for a T-shirt and a hand-mower.'

'A wonderful sermon, father; I liked the part about a time to sew and a time to reap. When would you say I should cover the naked December calls I sold last month?'

How to Succeed in Business - Strategy 2: Build relationships at the highest level.

"Good morning! I'd like to come in and talk to you about the Bible..."

Prophets are up.

"Pastor, we think it's time for your sabbatical."

'I'll be seeing you again right after our Quarterly Earnings Report.'

The Stock Market Giveth. . . The Stock Market Taketh Away.

'I used to think I couldn't serve both God and Mammon, and then I discovered multitasking!'