Fairytale Fusion Fan Gifts

'We'll have one long form, one short form, and one just-right form.'

Here be dragons.

Goodnight Moon for the Misbegotten

"Well, that one got away."

'If I told you what I wished for, you'd probably slap me.'

"Tonight I'm getting together with pals to sit around and croak."

This is the new Director's Cut version of Hansel and Gretel...with additional scenes and three alternative endings!!!

"The whole time we were dating, he kept saying, 'You can't catch me, I'm the Gingerbread Man!"

'Actually, there's no interview necessary. Just pull out the sword and the job's yours.'

"I knew we'd eventually catch him. He can't run and run as fast as he once did."

A Witch Consults Her Magic Mirror

"Name your sources."

Casual Thursday

“It’s the only way we can get him to kiss her.”

Midnight Basketball

'See, Mother - I knew those genetically modified beans would come good!'

Mirror mirror...

Rapunzel - before the make-over.

'Yeah, year, I get the moral of the story, but what are the legal ramifications?'

'And you thought you grew big pumpkins.'

Bowling - The Early Years. This game will never catch on --- it's too hard on the goalie.

Fairtale prosecutions.

"Someone has eaten our porridge, let's have pancakes."

"This is all I have time for now, dear...the knight slays the dragon and marries the princess. For more detail go to www.fairytale.net."

"And now, Bach's Brandenburg Concerto, Number One, first movement."

Snow White and the 7 Dwarfs on the Maury show: "I have the DNA results right here!"

You inserted donkey DNA into an insect? I made a braying mantis!

"What a disappointment. When you said your dad was a troll, I thought he'd be living under a bridge."

'Gretel, she's lying. It's not gluten free!'

"Read me the one about Ali Obama and the Forty Community Organizers."

The emperor has no phone!

"It's post-gingerbread."

Snow White and the Seven Dorks.

"Maybe selling the cow for a bag of beans was a bad deal, but my cholesterol has never been better!"

Snow White and the Seven Dorks.