Expense Explorer Gifts

"What else can I claim on my expense account?"

'I hope you don't mind ordering the free bread and water. My expense account isn't what it used to be.'

'I want to claim for black marker pens.'

Excess Baggage: Fans of 'Deregulation' and the 'Free Market' probably have not had to buy a plane ticket recently.

Rare Medical Conditions - The compulsive desire to work out restaurant bills correctly

'We do have a property in your price range, but we need a time machine to go back and visit it!'

'Take a letter,'

'Sorry to trouble you , sir , but did you remember to sign my expenses ?'

Bookkeeping Club

"I always knew I was cutting edge - I've gone cashless my entire life."

Euro Balloon: Please watch out for other currencies on your way down!

"I've been working on the household budget."

"I think the idea behind coin collecting is to get one of each kind, not all of the same kind!"

'Hello, Doc Barnes? I just got your bill. You've just bought yourself a cow.'

After income tax, pension and national insurance I end up owing £450.

"About your self employed expenses, do you do anything purely for pleasure?"

"Unfortunately as the law stands at the moment 13 pints and a curry because you had a crap day isn't tax deductible!"

"Chris, find a safe and fast way into lucrative tax heavens!"

'Our financial adviser urges us to take a hiking vacation this summer.'

'What wine goes with an enormous expense account?'

'How come you're questioning my petrol bill?'

Just remember, don't claim for lunch unless I was with you.

'The wife and I are planning to look at pictures of Vegas online for our vacation this year. How about you and your family?'

"This is a bend and breakfast. You sleep on a cafeteria table."

Contact Tree-Huggers.com for info on tax-deductible charitable trusts.

I'm not worried about taking it with me .. I'd just like it to last until I go.

'This Investment Portfolio is an extravagant waste of money! Oh hold on... that's my expense account!'

"You can't hide from us!"

'My wife's a Keynesian - she's always spending herself out of depressions.'

Chines Dollar

Wine Prices

Beefsteak travel, hamburger budget.

Confidential Loan Co.

'This Investment Portfolio is an extravagant waste of money! Oh hold on... that's my expense account!'

'Apples don't grow on trees you know.'