Expecting Yogi Gifts

So … you do a lot of yoga?

"Great! I must be growing. The womb was less than half full last week."

"Exercise ball? No thanks, I'm growing my own."

31. 19. 55.7.

"I'm trying to achieve total harmony of body, mind and cashflow."

Yoga with Baby

'Wish you wouldn't cut your nails at bedtime!'

'I'm finally at one with the universe...but apparently that doesn't include the DOW.'

"Well, it gets lonely up here!"

Hold for one more page, then roll over into the bended elbow, resting chin pose. Book yoga.

'We have to move - they're putting in a cell phone tower up here.'

What're you doing today, Darlene? Power relaxing. 9 to 10:15 I'm reading the paper. 10:20 to 11:30 I'm getting my nails done while reading Catch 22 for my books club. 11:45 to 1, I'm eating lunch, catching up on calls, paying bills then kicking back on the couch from 1 to 1:15. The afternoon is sheer bliss. Yoga from 2-3, Pilates from 3-4, massage from 4-5, meditation 5-6. Now move. Please now! You're interfering with my relaxing. How the type-A spend their Sundays. 10:02, bathroom break. Everyo

'Oh, sure -- You want me to waste my valuable time helping you extinguish your ego'

"I've had a lot of free time this year."

'I warned him that this was no place for a guy with inner-ear problems.'

'You should now feel relaxed and at one with your whole body.'

Transcendental Litigation

Tangled facing dog...

ME, MEDITATING ON NO-SELF

"Here goes nothing."

'I've been up here almost a month now -- when do we get paid?'

For Marcos, dissolving the ego was going to be a long-term process.

"Which celebrities do this type of yoga?"

"...Ouch...Ouch...Ouch...Ouch..."

"You're thirty minutes late. Does that mean I get it for free?"

Downward Dog

Yoga teacher vs me

'I'm getting worried about Goopta -- he's been having an out-of-body experience for three weeks now.'

Pot Needles

Woman does yoga with a baby.

Santa Yoga

Cat Yoga

"No, Lamaze is not a beginner type of yoga."

"Come on! You’ve done the whole ‘be one with the universe’ thing … be one with the Scotch."

"Downward Drool" is ok, but if you want something challenging, try "forward-facing full diaper."