Prenatal Yogi Gifts

So … you do a lot of yoga?

Pregnancy Yoga

"Great! I must be growing. The womb was less than half full last week."

"Exercise ball? No thanks, I'm growing my own."

Yoga classes door.

No kicking: 12-6 Mon-Sun

"I'd better enjoy this while I can. It's the only home I'll own without a mortgage!"

"I exercised so much during my first pregnancy that the baby was born with athlete's foot."

Proceed no further if chakras not aligned.

Birthing Ball

"All this stuff? I'm meeting for two now."

'We have to move - they're putting in a cell phone tower up here.'

'At my age, yoga keeps me flexible, so I can still lick myself clean...'

"Mom?"

Transcendental Litigation

Weathervanes.

Scheduel.

Stuff You Do In Pre-natel Class.

"If mum's aerobic classes are to continue I'll need a passenger safety airbag fitted!"

Yogi Mayor

"Some pilates classes would really loosen you up."

'How's your pilates class doing?'

'Another common mistake is to forget to take off the dirty nappy before putting the clean one on.'

'And you call yourself a hoop snake?'

"Remember, ladies, if you're doing this right, you shouldn't be able to do it."

A pair of yoga instructors use beds of nails on the beach.

GPs to be required to offer appointments in advance.

"I don't understand. Everyone knows I'm here yet no-one calls in to say hello."

Woman does yoga with a baby.

Cat Yoga

"Downward Drool" is ok, but if you want something challenging, try "forward-facing full diaper."

"No, Lamaze is not a beginner type of yoga."

Chasing a tennis ball is great, but rolling on a tennis ball really gets rid of the muscle knots.

Pregnant woman doing exercises.

"There's always one."