Expecting Mom Gifts

'It's the same model... he painted the second one eight months after the first painting.'

"That's all I get? A sonogram? No tracking number?"

"Pregnant? I just thought I went off my diet!"

"They grow up so fast."

'I told you it would be useful.'

The Baby Walker

"Don't worry, they normally look like little humans during the early scans."

"Great! I must be growing. The womb was less than half full last week."

"I only travelled with my umbilical cord!"

Pool attached to child's bed.

Pregnant lady being greeted by foetus.

Gifts for a cloned baby!

Man dreams of romance whilst a woman dreams of romance and babies.

"There's your son's heartbeat, and over here is the app he's developing."

Naturally, Bob thought the midwife was for him.

"No wonder babies are born screaming. I haven't had a wink of sleep since the exit light came on!"

"Remember, pregnancy is like taking an exciting thrill ride at an amusement park only the seats are larger."

"Exercise ball? No thanks, I'm growing my own."

'At this rate I'll end up with more heirs than hairs!'

"No, the cordless embryo isn't available."

"Force quit! Force quit! Force quit!!"

"Will you be putting her in day care or bringing her up artisanally?"

'Congratulations! You've just downloaded a baby boy.'

"The amnio's fine, the sex is male, and the name is Wade."

'and remember delivery is free if it happens in a half hour!'

'Are you pregnant? How do you know? You look terrible!'

Don't worry, I see babies, lots of babies...

"I'd better enjoy this while I can. It's the only home I'll own without a mortgage!"

No kicking: 12-6 Mon-Sun

Same Day Delivery: "I wish!"

"We realize that kids start using technology at a younger age these days, so our strollers come with Bluetooth, Wi-Fi and GPS."

'As you can see, it's too late for a termination...Baby is capable of surviving outside the womb...'

"I saved us a hundred bucks on a Jolly Jumper."