Exfoliation Gifts

"Apricot pit?! Are you kidding, Mister? This stuff knocks raw avocado and almond nut outta the water!!!"

The Garra Rufa's idea of a Grand Day Out.

Broadway Moosical.

"Don't tell me we've got to stay even longer in this godforsaken dump!"

"We're going to need a bigger rake."

Amputee watches wealthy man who has a spare set of legs.

Real estate.

"I would take out the curse words, but otherwise I think it's fine."

' ... plus you need to floss better.'

"Get out of that chair! Frank and Bernice will be here in an hour and I really don't want to spend half of that time cleaning cat hair off the furniture."

'It has had phenomenal growth and, for those involved, an atmosphere crawling with excitement. Congratulations, Hawkins, for heading our Bed Bug division.'

'It's one of the worst parts of the job. Seeing people in the most awful conditions. Cold, squalid, not fit for human habitation...It's no wonder we can't keep the staff.'

'Yes I floss regularly. Once every 6 months when I come here!'

'Love the motor home. I just never felt safe driving around in a little van.'

'Mrs. Zegenzahn, I'm an expert on exorcising demons, devils and poltergeists, but insurance representatives? There's no remedy for that.'

'I'm thinking of flipping this house.'

"Before long you'll be qualified and ready to start work."

'I'm sorry but I need your bed. I've just been kicked out my flat.'

"We should have stuck with the Squad tattoos rather than Brazillian wax jobs!"

"Do you have something in a smaller pig?"

'I need something to remove the hair on my chinny chin chin.'

'Haven't I seen you before? Yes, that's it. It was on my way up.'

Snail dreams of Motor Home.

"I'm waxing my armpits, do you like it?"

"Remember, bring it all back within two weeks and I'll refund your deposit."

'It's only Wednesday but something in the air makes me obsess about the weekend!'

Insecticide.

Acme Party Floss

A tightrope walker is thrown off by birds landing on one side of his balancing pole.

Akme Hair Removal and Waxing

"Come on, Doc, I brush and gargle, but flossing is out of the question!"

"If men spent time on hair removal, nothing would ever happen in the world, ever."

"Apparently it's a skill he picked up while online."

You just hit on a woman by telling her your philosophy of flossing? You sound so unfairly cynical. The main point is not about flossing. It's about having a philosophy. Women are looking for a man who has strong ideas. But your philosophy is so contradictory. You tell them that you believe in the long-term value of flossing but you're just interested in the short-term relationship with zero long-term prospects. Stick that in your philosophy, fancy he-man! Overthinking, anger, lack of huge muscle

"Admit it! You'd put me in a Winnebago if you could."