Exercise Expert Gifts

"He's a dedicated lifter, but he always skips leg day."

'When I suggested you take some regular exercise, I didn't mean just coming in to see me EVERY day.'

'Would you mind terribly taking up some other sport besides long-distance running?'

"Just another 50 decibels on your grunt and we can start to think about letting you hit a few balls!"

'You've hit the fitness plateau.'

Lady drying hair whilst on exercise bike.

Yoga for Alcoholics

"This feels like an accomplishment."

On the back of the t-shirt...

Businessman uses yoga moves while reviewing financial news on computer

'Hang in there, Larry, those endorphins will soon kick in.'

'Which one of you told Glurk to stretch before running?'

'Twenty years ago I began jogging five miles a day - could you tell me where I am?'

Biceps, muscles and brawn

A tortoise running along the side of the road, panting.

"What do you mean 'sitting is the new smoking'? I thought fat was the new smoking?"

'Of course I stretched first. That's how I hurt myself.'

"It seemed like miles to me!"

'If you exercise you add 10 years to your life.' - 'But I would spend the 10 years exercising.'

"Uh-oh. My inner GPS is recalculating."

Exercise Class

Running

'His workout regimen consists of 50 sit-downs every day.'

"I feel off. I want to feel off and running."

"I told him he should have trained more."

'He taught me the importance of taking a walk each day.'

Keep Fit.

Exercise Bars

"That's actually my phone. When I answer my calls I get a little bit of a workout."

'C'mon, c'mon! I want to be the first one on the stair-climbing machine!'

"You'll have to forgive Roland. He still uses 'stomach' and 'abdominals' interchangeably."

Jogging Bottoms

"I exercised so much during my first pregnancy that the baby was born with athlete's foot."

Are You a Quarathlete? Nifty Exercises You Can Do In Lockdown