Exercise Enthusiast Gifts

'I think it's time to concentrate a little more on your upper body!'

The over-40 workout

Just Do It. Just Did It.

"I don't think I can make the finish line, so I'm going back!"

'Five more, Billy! No pain, no gain!!'

How can we improve our health?

Woman on running machine next to a cake.

"I told him he should have trained more."

'If I have to be at those boring meetings, I might as well get something out of it.'

Use it or lose it.

'When it comes to stress relief, I believe in a holistic approach.'

'I want you to lose 50 pounds, and then tell me how you did it.'

'The directions were easy to understand...until you got past step 2.'

"When I suggested you exercise to slim down I meant all of you!"

Woman and sport trainer

"I've accepted him as my personal trainer."

"Can't you take up some kind of sport that doesn't involve spandex?"

"I do exercise, stretching exercises. Got the stretch marks to prove it."

'You'll be spending a little time in pilates purgatory but don't worry, those guys work miracles.'

"My doctor wants me to walk a mile after every meal. But frankly, ten miles a day is killing me."

'Dave dropped out. He had chest pains and trouble breathing. They think he may have competitive heart failure.'

'What, you afraid of a little exercise?'

Fitness centre has man exhausted from filling in application form.

'Which one of you told Glurk to stretch before running?'

"Walking in the hall carrying a file folder makes you look busy. This allows you to get an aerobic workout and nobody is the wiser."

'Too much intake - not enough burnout.'

The Rat Race

"No - running late, jumping to conclusions, pushing your luck and jogging your memory, doesn't count as exercise."

Old and energetic

'Wander in the desert for forty years? -Is this some kind of FITNESS program?'

"You have two choices, one hour of exercising every day or 24 hours of being dead every day."

'Warranty? It depends. Will you be using it for exercise or to hang your clothes on?'

'I'm working off Saturday's sundae.'

Two men are jogging. One is noticing 'Danger Wide Load' sign on back of other.

The Grim Reaper Keeps Fit