Exercise Expert Pillows

"He's a dedicated lifter, but he always skips leg day."

'When I suggested you take some regular exercise, I didn't mean just coming in to see me EVERY day.'

'Would you mind terribly taking up some other sport besides long-distance running?'

"You think you can? Think again, mister. You know you can. Got that?"

"Just another 50 decibels on your grunt and we can start to think about letting you hit a few balls!"

'You've hit the fitness plateau.'

Lady drying hair whilst on exercise bike.

Yoga for Alcoholics

"This feels like an accomplishment."

On the back of the t-shirt...

Businessman uses yoga moves while reviewing financial news on computer

'Hang in there, Larry, those endorphins will soon kick in.'

'Which one of you told Glurk to stretch before running?'

'Twenty years ago I began jogging five miles a day - could you tell me where I am?'

Man practising karate is tempted by a glass of beer.

A tortoise running along the side of the road, panting.

"Uh-oh. My inner GPS is recalculating."

Biceps, muscles and brawn

Running

'Of course I stretched first. That's how I hurt myself.'

"It seemed like miles to me!"

'If you exercise you add 10 years to your life.' - 'But I would spend the 10 years exercising.'

Exercise Class

Sam's Gym. My problem is I can't get the body I want with the body I've got!

"What do you mean 'sitting is the new smoking'? I thought fat was the new smoking?"

'His workout regimen consists of 50 sit-downs every day.'

"I feel off. I want to feel off and running."

"I told him he should have trained more."

'He taught me the importance of taking a walk each day.'

I have been working so hard I haven't gone to the gym in ages. You've been trying to make ends meet and forgot about the middle!

"That's actually my phone. When I answer my calls I get a little bit of a workout."

Are You a Quarathlete? Nifty Exercises You Can Do In Lockdown

Woman forcing family to hike through hills.

"You'll have to forgive Roland. He still uses 'stomach' and 'abdominals' interchangeably."

'Swimming is the healthiest sport. . . Because it's the only one where you can't smoke while you're doing it.'