Ex-soldier Gifts

"You're very interesting, for a civilian."

'This is the only part of my old Army uniform that still fits.'

"Approaching 10,000 steps."

'Past performance is not an indication of future results.'

International Women's Day.

'A portcullis is SO yesterday!'

"Monsieur, si vous plaît. I'm sure I ordered the fusilli and not the Fusilier."

Servicemen.

Cat in a tank...

Military Medals

HDQTRS division, Motor Pool and Covert Ops.

'This has the makings of their toughest season ever.'

"War is hell and so is this soup."

'This one's for marrying him, and this one's for raising the kids.'

Kid to mom: 'Tell me again about the time you helped fortress a city, subdue hostile fire and got home and baked us all raspberry strudels.'

Soldier armed with a pen.

'I was in a camouflage unit, so this one is for Hide and Seek.'

'This one is for serving 27 years in the military without anyone finding out I'm gay.'

'Any wilderness skills besides making smores?'

"I'm trying to forget a pussycat."

'You can come down a peg. Mesopotamia gave the world bureaucracy, you know.'

"How come you always take Amnesty International's side?"

Monuments

'Three weeks of brutal alimony negotiations, Polly, and you settle for a cracker!'

"No, you dismantle your nuclear arsenal first."

Armed forces waiting with nothing to do.

'At ease, soldier.'

'It's not as easy as you think - saddle sores, bursitis in the shoulder, pigeons...'

UNFADED GLORY

"Remember when we had to get along on twenty-one dollars a month!"

Red Letter Days - Encounter with the old village sweetheart - 'bless my soul! ... Miss Victoire! ...'

Thank you to those who never came home and to those who never left their side.

The dress uniform of the Catering Corps

'Trust me, you're not going to need an alarm clock.'

Happy Labour Day: While you enjoy that last long weekend of summer, remember...there are some folks who aren't taking the weekend off.