Ethicists Gifts

"Do a double-blind test. Give the new drug to rich patients and a placebo to the poor. No sense getting their hopes up. They couldn't afford it even if it works."

'That's it, in a nutshell.'

This Is What Moral Corruption Looks Like

Actually, Forced Child Separations Are All-American

"Whaddaya know - 'Made in hell by former sweatshop owners.'"

'It's a great invention, but what if it falls into the wrong hands?'

Self Checkout

Enhanced Pedophilia Interrogation Techniques

Ethics exam cheater.

"Everyone at Megadrug is committed to the benefits of spoken therapies, which is why we developed 'nitrazone' to enhance the experience."

Squeezing the Free Press.

Others will fight for you

'You'll like this, gang ? it's an 'eyes-only' list of 'shady-but-tolerated' loopholes allowed by the Securities and Exchange Commission.'

Build your very own conflict of interest!

"I guess it's ethical. Let me run it through my 'Ethics Check' app."

"It's a memo from the legal department reminding us to (heh-heh), 'keep our noses clean'."

"Think you're pretty manly, eh? OK, put the gun down and let's have a fair fight."

"I'm not having it if it's been genetically modified."

'Loved your bit on market share, Felton - perfect blend of plausibility and outright deception.'

He avoids wrath, envy, lust, greed, gluttony and sloth -- the problem is he's proud of it!

"In a further effort to increase profits, control costs and satisfy shareholders, we've decided to steal stuff."

'You won't believe this, but even if the vaccine works, they wont give it to other sick mice.'

'The question is - to what level of data do we wish to stoop.'

The Price of Freedom

"Moulting"

"Take special note of the change to our policy on honesty."

"I think you refuse to admit your god condones slavery, because doing so would be an admission you are more moral than he is. And that conflicts with your Borg programming."

"Boss... I just read an article about trans-humanism. Apparently, sometime in the next 50 years, it will become possible to live forever."

"Hi, Bob - your consultants have just arrived."

'You're in luck. Business ethics is a gray area.'

Stoneage business ethics: 'But, hey, this 'ethics' stuff isn't carved in stone!'

Experience is important, so I'm inclined to leave questions of ethics to those who have them.

"Discussion topic: Is our society becoming less civil and more violent?"

'We're getting back to first principles...which means we're going to have some.'

"Absolutely, Senator, in my mind it was always my country first, and obscene profits second."