Enthusiast Of The Bizarre Gifts

'It has put a bit of strain on the marriage, to be honest, his career as 'the human fly'.'

"Good" "Bad" "Work on it" "Keep working - maybe it's not as bad as you think it is" "Put it to a committee" "Give up" "Make it worse" "Make it better" "Still a bad idea" "Overthink it" "Throw yourself into a pit of wild badgers" "Throw it away" "Call it done" "Sigh."

"I thought we agreed you weren't going to work at home."

"You know how it is, one minute I'm selling insurance in South Dakota and the next minute I have a hook for a hand. How about you?"

'Darling - I think it's time to stop feeding the birds.'

A golden Big Boy holding a plate of poop

"Day 4,261... I don’t know how much longer I can survive. Still no signs of civilization. Food is scarce and I fear the wound on my ankle is infected. Still, all this pales in comparison to the horror of having to be anywhere at any particular time."

'I'd like two pizzas, one with cheese and pepperoni and the other with cheese and sausage. One more thing, do you deliver?'

"After the drugstore, I need you to find fresh parmesan."

Glance Exchange

"He was a sea rescue."

"Now you can send it."

"Who's next?"

Fred's new phone plan included unlimited Dada.

'He refuses to leave without the tree and their son.'

"Valet park only"

'Because the horned one commands them to, that's how!'

One way only.

"It's my helper trout!"

"Remember that time I let you steer the boat and we crashed and had to swim here to die? Remember?"

Ship upsidedown in a bottle has rescue boat in bottle next to it.

UFO and snowman

'Miss Jones, take this down.'

Baseball.

Operation.

'Hey! You're not for real, are you man?'

"What a way to go."

"I like fountains very much!"

Fish swimming in a pint of beer.

'You need some stress.'

". . . so a duck walks into a . . ."

"Well, I finally saw a shrink today."

"'Let's introduce him to a mirror' he said. 'It'll be fun he said'. You call the coroner!"

"Well, by that logic no one would ever shave a clock onto a monkey."