Enlightenment Gifts

"Are you not thinking what I'm not thinking?"

A man seeking truth encounters a clown.

'Psst! I just realised something... I'm hella bored.'

'Don't just sit there thinking. Meditate.'

"Sorry, but, as you can see, I finally found the answer to the true meaning of life."

'Do you ever get the feeling that true inner peace is more darn trouble than it's worth?'

The Beginning is Way, Way Back

"Oh, great - They changed the Meaning of Life again."

'That's old Goopta - he decided to quit at the top of his game.'

Guru.

'Now, until you've attained perfect wisdom, you'll have to learn to evade questions.'

'It's not considered good form to brag about extinguishing your ego.'

'Embrace nonviolence!', 'I don't see how THAT'S going to help.'

"I was hit by a bus while in my spiritual journey..."

'Well, I don't WANT to become one with any Universe that HE'S one with!'

'That's old Goopta - he decided to quit at the top of his game.'

'He attained Nirvana in two weeks? - he's GOTTA be using steroids!'

'Don't tell anybody, but I'm not wearing a robe.'

'I didn't realize that enlightenment would be so BORING!'

"It's either enlightenment or excruciating boredom."

When Buddha came to nirvana.

"I just attained enlightenment! - Gimme a high-five!"

"In the Game of Life, my son, the fix is in."

"You want to become enlightened?"

"Goopta feels that enlightenment should be fun."

'Hey, hey -- You've got to stay focussed.'

"Who plays ball with the Dalai Lama?" "That's right." "What's right?" "Who plays ball with the Dalai Lama." "Why are you asking me?"

As soon as I've extinguished my ego, I'm going to take some "me" time.

You're enlightened, eh? --- How's that working out for you?

"Oh-oh - I think I just lost my enlightenment momentum!"

'Sorry about that -- I should have warned you about the Sun coming up like thunder out of china 'cross the bay.'

''Faith can move mountains'? -- That's actually a little disturbing.'

'Have you been working out?'

'Shirley MacLaine claims to remember past lives.' 'I thought she looked familiar!'

The meaning of life? You're lookin at it.