Enjoys Sporty Banter Gifts

'Remember, it's YOUR benefit game - go out and foul whoever you like!'

Cat and mouse.

"Why so aloof in here? When you're on base, you yak your ass off with every Yankee in sight."

'He's a bit confused after that last round.'

Rest in Peace Instant Replay

Gym. Instructor. Why do you want to learn kickboxing? I've always wanted to win a fight hands down!

"Oh Gregori! You tell such funny stories!"

Footballer holding team mates bum while preparing for a penalty shoot out

I think it's time to retire from boxing. I'm too old for life in the fist lane.

'That was a peach of a right hander the referee gave you!'

Hot dog.

"Wow! This really is a lofted iron!"

'Eton Football (By Dumb-Crambo Junior.)'

'It's internal. Probably one of his stomachs...'

'Thank you for calling the bullpen,,, To continue in English, Press one,,,'

The Pole Vault Washing Line

"Who are you looking at? Want to kick off, do you?"

"You mock, sir—you mock a sport storied and beloved. I, sir, pity you."

Red Card on the Podium

Bride throws bouquet, woman dressed in American footballer's outfit catches it.

'Please cover for me Carol. I'll be away from my desk, roaming the cubicles, searching for sports talk.'

(Carl's Sports Bar) - 'Hockey Sucks!!' - Although Earl had made good on his dare, it would be weeks before he could eat solid food again.

'Out batted, out bowled, out fielded!'

"The coach said that you play like Ronaldo? Ha! You loser! He told me I play like Chloe Kelly!"

'You wobbled his knees! Hit him again! Hit him again!'

'Apparently he does 20 yards to the pint.'

Fish golfing.

I didn't think I would, but I miss being booed.

The theraputic quality of the World Cup only comes to the fore with a good xenophobic thrashing of foreigners.

"Well, if you don't want to talk politics would you like to talk baseball?"

'The fish and chips are very nice.'

"You're a plumber, I'm a doctor. Now that I've given you some free medical advice, how about stepping into my kitchen and fixing my leaky faucet?"

"And you're saying they get paid big money to chase a ball."

'Guess where these low cost shotgun shells were made!!'

IV