Emotional Strategist Pillows

"Enough already! You’re depressing me!"

Personal Relationship Counsellor

'men have no idea how to take action.'

'Thanks for the coaching, the tears did the trick: My parents bought me a mobile phone!'

'How many are just staying together for the kids? OK, that's good, very good.'

"I'm a sucker when she turns on the tears."

Surfing the daily stress

'The toughest things you have to deal with in this job, is feelings and lawyers.'

'May I be excused? I just checked my college investment portfolio online, and I feel sick.'

"The anger management consultant said he wasn't going to alter his **** dates at this t****stage which fits in with the 'managing change' consultant who said it was to late to change her plans..."

"What I’ve learned is you have to look deep inside your heart and ask yourself, ‘What is it that she really wants to hear?’"

"He keeps reissuing everything I take issue with."

The Map of the Human Heart

The Wishing Well

Planned Parenthood: Not Tonight Dear. I Have a Headache.

"And this right here was our weekend in the Hamptons."

Sad boss: "This one pretty much sums it up."

Anger Management: Breathe in and Breathe out.

'He's never there for me.'

Dating the efficiency expert.

"I don't know whether to love you or leave you - but then that's the reality of arbitrage."

"Now at this point reality intruded."

''Normal' seems too much to shoot for ... but maybe I can keep you out of the nuthouse.'

"Only time can heal a broken heart, Brenda, and fortunately I have the time, every Thursday at three o'clock."

'Don't worry, I've got your back.'

'You need some stress.'

If you are ringing your coach to ask about your next move then we're finished.

Marriage counselor, living together counselor or a just screwing around counselor.

'It's not a 20 year low! We've been in business only 19 years.'

"Am I worried about going belly-up? Well, I can't get my fingers uncrossed and I sleep face down."

'First, you have to stop treating your husband like a child.'

"No, I don't think our marriage would benefit from a mission statement."

'By proposing a merger instead of marriage, we can deduct this meal as a business expense.'

"If I didn't worry all the time what would I do with myself?"

'When you play hard to get you really mean it, don't you?'