Emergency Preparedness Enthusiasts Gifts

The queue for gas in New York.

"Unfortunately, your son swallowed a great deal of industrial adhesive. But don't worry: Epoxy can be cured."

Natural Disasters

Who should I call first? 911 or Technical Support?

'Hanging around the house, Fred, just in case.'

'Relax. This is only a test.'

Tsunami Evac Route

"The blaze has taken hold on the eight floor Chief. The C.E.O., V.P. and C.O.O. are trapped in the boardroom!!"

"My God, now what?"

Emergency Underpants

We can't call an ambulance. He doesn't allow personal calls on company time.

Fire Backwards.

'Oh - It's you.'

'Kitchen! Chicken Bone! Hurry!!' - Rent-A-Surgeon

'The tropical tax haven where he offshored his business was just hit by a tsunami.'

"I've got a pulse!"

'Now, lift and squeeze the diaphragm.' ... 'Sweet.'

'I'm a doctor... This man needs someone who can grant me immunity from liability, and FAST!'

Why dogs hate CPR.

"Quick! Turn the siren on!"

Customer tangled up in velvet rope is trying to ring bell for help.

'Hold it, you can cancel that STAT call.'

"We ran into a marathon."

'Of course the scientists have got this all wrong about climate change.'

'Just this once sir, we need the overtime.'

"Whoa...not so fast! First of all please tell me your address, your health insurance number, and spell your name for me, Mr. HelpI'mBleedingToDeath."

"Hello, A and E, which department do you need, stabbing, shooting or general GBH?"

Man with mobile phone says: 'I can't call for help, I'm filming this for the TV news.'

'I said he needs an ambulance! Not ambiance!'

'Which is it, Bill? You had a terrible accident and survived without a scratch. Or, you had a terrible accident and lost a lot of blood?'

Police officer giving ticket to paramedics.

Self-driving fire engine...quickly responds to an alarm.

Helicopter Rescues.

'You'd better clear out some rooms, nurse. He jumped off a bridge, and all his friends are behind him.'

Water Drop with a Surprise