Elephant Aficionados Gifts

That's funny, I always thought they were trumpeters.

"Wait. . . man, I totally forgot what I was gonna say."

Indian rajah rowing elephant in a monsoon flood.

"Well, I had 'the talk' with him.

The operation was going extremely well, but then very unexpectedly, he got trampled.

"Consider yourself lucky that you only got a little shaken up in that dryer--socks get lost in that thing and aren't ever seen again.'

"Not to brag or anything, but I'm the elephant in the room at my company."

"Oh, wow! Is that stunning or what?" "Mid-century classic. Should be in a museum. Let's pee on it." "Totally."

'Of course you're out of gas. You forgot to fill up at the last stop...maybe this will teach you to stop daydreaming.'

"I have spirit, yes I do. I have spirit, how 'bout you?"

"Okay, you can keep 'em, but if they grow any bigger, they'll have to sleep in the kitchen."

'This goes way beyond just keeping the flies off me...I'm fighting crime now too!'

Elephant ass selfie.

"So who is this First pet?"

The circus diver.

'By Jove, we've finally found it! the fabled elephants' disco!'

"Man, these closed book exams suck! Who could possibly remember all this crap?"

'Yes, the baby should arrive soon: Her nesting instinct is in overdrive!'

"I thought you were getting me a dog?"

Bob realised that he'd had his binoculars back to front.

'Peekaboo!'

"Only one of my lives was a bowl of cherries."

Table Of The Elephants

"No need for stage fright, it's just a documentary crew: be yourself..."

"'Course I've seen one before...but never one that ate peanuts!"

'You did remember the condoms didn't you?'

Domestic event in the Zoological Gardens No. I. - The nose of the hippopotamus put out of joint by the young elephant

'You know what I really like in someone? Bulk!'

Zoo warden attempting to impress woman visitor

'Jumbo waits for the tusk fairy'

"I was going to get a cat but they had an offer on."

Ernie's spent his entire career studying one species. He says everything else is "irrelephant."

"You finished with your peanuts?"

'You may have found more new customers than the other salesmen, but your profits are too small! Stop just pulling in peanuts, Barry!'

'I told you it would fit.'