Elderly Advocates Pillows

'He steals from the drug companies and gives to the elderly!'

'You seem quieter tonight. Did they give you something to help you relax?'

"Someone to see you!"

"I'm the lot of baggage he comes with."

"Seventy-seven. How about yours."

Sir Isaac Newton Sucks!

Potts is having a job keeping up with the young turks.

"Alright, Grandfather, let's check your ticker."

'Oh no! We forgot to unstrap granny before we left!'

"For someone your age, the yearly premium on a $5,000 policy is $8,000."

How to save money on geriatric care?

"Methuselah's been retired for over 800 years, but what is he retired from?"

Angry pensioner

Getting Old Sucks: "Incontinence hotline. Can you hold please?"

'Accelerate! Coffin Dodgers Crossing.'

Geriatrics struggle with a personnel shortage.

"I don't want your darn money! Get back here with that glass!"

Age Concern and Pension concerns.

"Working with the elderly requires significant capital investment....ramps, high raise chairs, alarms."

'She'll come round to the idea of a Granny Flat eventually.'

"I assure you that you don't have Alzheimer's because you paid my fee last week."

"Make my face sag - I want people to think I've never had plastic surgery."

Pension Calculation

"Relax, I've been specializing in gerontology for over six months."

'Nobility vehicle'

"We've brought Dad home form hospital for the weekend"

''Heaven's Waiting' Retirement Home? . . . 'We care for your parents so you don't have to.''

Old people sign - Whatever