Egg Layer Club Member Gifts

'Believe me, Bertha, you won't get stretch marks from laying eggs.'

'Good news! Our nest egg is developing into a double yoke.'

Clyde in his 'egg-beater.'

"Number 2. Step forward please."

"The secret of my success is combining eggs, meat and bread in enough ways to make an eight page breakfast menu."

Where Deviled Eggs come from

'Superstock'

"I can assure you ladies all our eggs come from free range chickens."

'The Easter Bunny has started outsourcing to us.'

"Don't be so dramatic. You tell me you're pregnant every day?"

WHACK!

Woman keeping a chicken in her room for fresh eggs

"I'd go with French Impressionist. It evokes the burnished golds of autumn leaves and the bittersweet regrets of lost love. It's also on special."

"Then add one extra large egg..."

Mountain climbers, "Someone's been here before us."

"How she's able to manage a career and still juggle her family, I'll never know."

I hate it when they order scrambled eggs.

'I forgave ya for puttin' 'em all in one basket, but this goes too far!'

To the office...happy Easter, from Sid.

Egg Buggy

"Anybody see where I laid... my... my... you monsters."

"At long last we've discovered evidence of a poultrygeist!"

"Mom, Dad, I have something to tell you."

"I've had 720 children. I hope they're all doing well."

'I don't know the story of the two eggs.'

"No, I don't think I have a book in me. I think I have a chicken in me."

'This is taking too long - we'll have to induce hatching.'

"You don't use a search engine for an Easter egg hunt."

'Who said you could come out of your room?'

'How do you want your eggs, too hard or too soft?'

'Just add eggs. That sounds easy.'

"Why am I irate? A: You turn my eggs into omelets each morning. B: Not once have you offered me even a nibble."

"I'm trying to hide Easter Eggs, and he thinks we're playing fetch."

'They are poached eggs, sir -- we grabbed them when the chicken wasn't looking!'