Education Sceptics Gifts

'Graduating with honors in physics, Brad will be a mall janitor. Joseph Ferg, summa cum laude in math, will be selling pretzels in Manhattan...'

Toy Shops and Educated Children

Common Core Family Therapy

"Remember, education pays, unless you end up an adjunct - like me."

"I like it, honey ... it speaks to what a waste of time your MFA was."

"If your dad is truly the King of the Jungle, why can't you ask him to abolish school?"

"No, Einstein's theory of relativity isn't, 'don't marry your cousin.'"

Personnel. Now, I want you to forget everything you learned in school. I'm way ahead of you!

"Well yes, I was shorn by the apprentice, but I don't mind really: everybody has to learn somehow..."

'You're FLUNKING me? - Doesn't SENIORITY count for anything around here?'

'Can I help it if she's a rotten teacher?'

"If you get to be a stay-at-home dad, why can't I be a stay-at-home daughter?"

"I don't mind them counting the days 'til school's out, but I wish they wouldn't do it on their fingers."

Go to M.I.T., they said. You'll do great things, they said.

'Boy or girl, straight or gay - I don't care as long as it's science-literate and non-republican.'

"We can determine your child's gender, IQ and student debt load."

'Who should be contacted in case of an accident? Why, 911, of course. And these people are going to be teaching my children.'

'My father says, these intelligence tests are biased towards the intelligent.'

"They make us learn reading, writing, and arithmetic to prepare us for a world of videotapes, computer terminals and calculators."

'Remind me again, Dad. Why did you want me to get that college degree?'

'Oh, we don't actually teach math any more ? we found it was too hard on the kids' self-esteem.'

Cover Design for the Savoy (No. 7)- the Eternal Problem of Youth and Pedantry

'Going to school is NOT an abusive relationship!'

"What's the point of school? We can just look all this stuff up on wikipedia."

"Personally, this child would love to be 'left behind.'"

"What did I learn in school today...I learned I don't like school!"

Remembering the words of his 8th grade Algebra teacher, Moose bought his old middle school and made a mockery out of it.

"Why do I have to work hard at school? I can buy a degree on the internet!"

'Dad said that experience is the best teacher, so I cut school and went to the video arcade.'

Cutting Room Floor

'What part of school don't you understand?', 'The part between the bells ringing.'

"Our curriculum focusses less on rote memorization and more on putzing around."

"I see you graduated Summa Cum Laude, but then didn't your whole graduating class."

"My teacher says I lack 'intellectual curiosity,' whatever that is."

Quiz Today. I don't remember clicking of any terms of agreement that cover this!