Duty-free Collector Gifts

The human projectile. Man walking into rink with duty free.

Servicemen.

You're telling me not to choose sides between Google and Apple. Precisely. Computer Villa. Stay neutral. Continue to support both companies. Emotionally. Right. By buying as much as you can from both companies. Doesn't that only benefit you? Heretic. Absolve yourself by upgrading your phone! Computer Villa.

"Sure, shopping online is faster and cheaper, but there's something almost sensuous about carrying an armload of packages!"

"Amazon's new A.I. just 'gets' me."

"Tom, I’d like you to meet Chris. Chris is better than you."

Armed forces waiting with nothing to do.

"Oh, don't mind that, it's just my body of unseen work."

Teapot

"Pinpoint havoc, gentlemen, accuracy of mayhem. And yet our dress blues remain crisp and sharp, our hands soft and pink."

"Just the slippers is fine!"

'I'm sorry about the slippers...but I do need the roghage.'

"The camera is mounted on your desk for a reason. There's been some paperclips missing, and we think you're the culprit."

'I do good work... unfortunately, I don't do it here.'

A Rifle Competition in the North

"We're a family here and you'll be like a son to me - illegitimate, of course."

"I'm down here, Mona. That's your slipper."

'I'm fired, am I -- What's that supposed to mean?'

Sarah Palin Fact #2783, Sarah Palin makes her own diamond earrings by squeezing coal.

Aberdeen Smoking the Pipe of Peace - Aberdeen and France at War with Russia

"Not until you fetch the other one."

Count Von Moltke.

'Most dogs chase cars, Sally but mine is into them!'

As you like it - One way of catching fish

"Your main problem is that instead of a set of complex organs composed of specialized sensory cells and sophisticated nerve structures, you've got two pieces of coal."

Sergeant Stripes

"Your new book, 'Help - My Head's Caught in a Pipe,' has been called by some to be semi-autobiographical. Can you comment on these rumors?"

In case of emergency...break glass: Crisis Manual.

"I've had my eye on you for some time, Parker....just what is it you're supposed to do around here?"

Work clothes.

'What'll it be . . . too large or too small?'

"Come on, Baldo...get up. It's twenty to eleven."

A rabbit wearing slippers with a human face on them.

"He thinks he's located a World War I torpedo boat. What's exciting at your house?"

'All that smoking has stunted your growth.'