Do Not Disturb Collector Gifts

'Harold! Go in for ... dang.'

"Why don't you start with tennis balls?!"

'And with this one I scored 138 not out...every one off the edge.'

"It says it can be assembled by a 5 year old child - pop out and find me one..."

'So glad we ticked the no publicity box.'

'Now I'm going to lump all your nagging little worries into one big complex.'

"...as the devices were nestled on their chargers with care,..."

"Right - that's my laptop, my laptop charger...my kindle, my kindle charger....my iphone, my iphone charger...my ipad, my ipad charger...all my spare batteries and spare chargers...hmmm, I don't seem to have any room for my clothes..."

'I hear you played football instead of going to school.'

"If you roped your cowhand by mistake, turn to page 21..."

Frankenstein Collectibles: Buyer Beware

'Well, you'll just have to CONTROL your urge to yodel!'

'I'm in a good mood bad mood.'

' I thought we had six fish in the livewell.'

JB doesn't like to see anybody that's stressful.

"I bought this one behind my art consultant's back."

Ringing bell

"Stop moving!"

'And here's a look at our ancient ancestor after being thrown on a door step.'

Man lost in desert, sign reads: Caution Sun Glare next 200 miles.

Caution: slippery surface.

'I move that our investment club meet here next Wednesday, whereupon we will once again check under the cushions.'

Vegetal Print

Beware of the Frog

"Finding coins under your couch cushions doesn't count as finding buried treasure."

Stop before it's too late

Medicare check in the mail:23,400 bad addesses

'I feel insulted whenever I receive a royalties check for the bloopers reruns.'

Cull manufacturers who don't standardise electrical chargers.

Last Sign You'll Ever See

Dummies for Dummies.