Driving Etiquette Critic Pillows

"Glasses? Oh heavens no - just get super obnoxious LED lights and drive with your brights on."

'Hey, you just cut me off!'

"Great coffee, Carole."

"My Twitter account isn't too interesting. It's mostly just a bunch of threats."

Speed laws occasionally enforced.

Not very ladylike. Please help.

"Not at the table."

No Pontificating in the Bean Bag Chair

'Do you have to slurp while you eat?'

'Are you a footballer?'

"You're very courteous for a hog"

'That tut, tut sound when you park..? It's your husband.'

I can't find the gears!

"Could we try parking again please, Mr. Zog?"

"Can't you crunch bones with your mouth closed?"

"Darling, you're going to have to text our son to ask if he wants some potatoes."

His text said, I challenge you to pistols at dawn, and I replied, C U there, and he replied with a thumbs-up emoji – Do I have to reply to that?

"OK, gotta go...hey, why is everyone at my table singing the Hallelujah chorus?"

Car sign reads: 'How's my wife's driving?'

'I'm not a bad driver, they're bad pedestrians.'

Speed Bump

"May I have this dance, Miss?"

"You can't do that, Scott – this is Chicago."

'Put away that damned smartphone!'

"You're embarrassing yourself again Edward. If you want a bigger wine glass, just ask the waiter."

"Frequently rude drivers ahead."

Boy Laughs At Man Who Has Fallen Down.

'Son, stay away from drug addicts - don't watch the Tour de France!'

Newly Proposed Phone Regulations.

"You look like you haven't lost weight."

"Don't interrupt me when I'm texting to you!"

'Are you back or front seat driving?'

'GBY.' Text speak for 'God bless you.'

Driving School - "Now I want you to reverse around a corner whilst talking into your mobile phone."

'Margie, that rude guy who's always on his cell phone is coming through my line again!'