Driving Anecdotes Fan Gifts

I can't find the gears!

Man helping a mini learner driver

Things Mothers don't want to hear from their five year olds...

"Oh look, that police car is chasing someone! Let me get out of his way. Hmm...he's still behind me. Let me move... That's odd....he's still behind me. I'll move over another lane."

I love my motor.

"Were you using your mobile?" "How could I possibly? I've had my hands full eating and smoking!"

Motorway notices reading: 'Fog. But if you can read this, it isn't that bad'.

'It was HIS fault, he was doing the SPEED LIMIT!'

If a motorist came bursting through the doors...would he be up for damages?

"You can turn your blinker off now, Senator."

Warning, It's raining cats and dogs.

Name stickers on car windscreen.

'It is fuel efficient, but my ego feels crunched.'

"I failed driver's ed....Apparently there's like this rule about rear-ending a police car!"

Stone Age Driving Test

Student tower pulling along a student driver.

"You call that teaching."

I don't brake for tail gators.

"You're very courteous for a hog"

'She think we're waiting out here in this sun? Hot-wire this sucker!'

"Do you think the atmosphere would be better if the roof was closed?"

"Aside from the foot, do you think my parking's getting better?"

'I had to go that fast in order to keep that nut from passing me!'

"And now I'd like you to eat a chicken and mayonnaise sandwich shile answering your mobile."

'How was my emergency stop?'

'It's green, you color-blind, flea-bitten bonehead! Where'd you learn to drive?'

For Those Who Don't Feel That Driving School Is Quite Enough, There's...Driver's University

'Morning Mr Walker, remember me? You sacked me last month...'

"Could we try parking again please, Mr. Zog?"

'When I tap the keyboard I want you to do an emergency stop.'

"Today we're learning how to simultaneously drive and talk on the cell phone!"

'I want some lessons in back seat driving.'

"I want you to stop giving my son homework."

"The Motor Vehicle Department had some concerns for my safety."

" I won't ask how your first lesson went."