Driving Aficionado Gifts

At fork in road, cars merge into one.

'Hello, my name is Al and it's been 6 weeks since I last left my turn signal on for more than fifteen minutes.'

'It was HIS fault, he was doing the SPEED LIMIT!'

'This time the auto maker is recalling all the drivers.'

Warning, It's raining cats and dogs.

Motorway notices reading: 'Fog. But if you can read this, it isn't that bad'.

"Our diagnostics didn't find anything wrong with your vehicle. We think that the problem is you."

"Do you think the atmosphere would be better if the roof was closed?"

Driving Instructions/Backseat Driver

Elephant Driving School.

"You call that teaching."

'I dreamed last night that she was sixteen and had a learner's permit.'

"Okay, I've come to a full stop at the sign - now what?"

Things Mothers don't want to hear from their five year olds...

'When I tap the keyboard I want you to do an emergency stop.'

No Parking.

'Morning Mr Walker, remember me? You sacked me last month...'

"I asked you to do a 3-point turn. What you've done is a full 12-point penalty turn!"

The Ray Bradbury classic, 'The Car Alarm.'

"This is my new country song I wrote about my self-driving truck leaving me..."

"I hear you bought a new classic car."

'Can we afford you to save us money by repairing the car yourself...?'

Man has a picture of a rolls on his garage door...the car inside is very different.

"And the winner is… Dan the Man by a nose!"

A tortoise running along the side of the road, panting.

"I want to be straight with you, Cathy—I've gone through a number of cars in my life."

'This is a nice car Mr...did you have it from new?'

'It seats two comfortably.'

Middle-aged guy spots an available convertible. The mating ritual begins.

Mohammad's motors

"It's really quite simple: Shave off the soul patch and the car is yours."

It's great for pulling the birds!

Route 666

'I think I've isolated that funny noise you've been having.'

Inflating Boobs.